This post was contributed by Annie, Generations of Virtue’s warehouse manager and mother to three young boys. Annie gives her top 15 tips to help you in your battle for purity. Her advice is both practical and encouraging. Enjoy!
1. Live with the end in mind. Not just the end….where you get married and now you can do whatever you want….I mean the end, when you are standing with Jesus Christ, in heaven. Living pure is a constant battle. It doesn’t end when you get married.
2. Really watch your thoughts. Watch what you are looking at. One of the things I stopped doing was watching any shows or movies where I knew I would be tempted to get involved emotionally with the characters. I hope that makes sense. Especially being married, I try not to watch shows where I get gooey over one of the actors.
3. Don’t go to a place where you know it will be a temptation to flirt. Better to stay home that night or that weekend.
4. Stay emotionally pure. This will help you so much in your fight for purity. Giving your heart away hurts. The hurt doesn’t go away when you get married. Sometimes it’s even harder because it tends to turn to guilt. You feel guilty about your past or the times your thoughts wander to someone else. We’re not talking about physical actions in this case, but the memories where you stayed up late talking to so and so, or when so and so said this really great thing to you. Those thoughts carry feelings with them. Our feelings affect how we act today.
5. Be proactive by setting boundaries. Some examples are setting a curfew, especially with the opposite sex. Like, you won’t stay out with a person of the opposite sex after 8 pm or something like that. It’s like when you decide before hand what you are going to order when you go to a restaurant, you maybe call ahead to get a menu and then when you go, you’re not as tempted to order that really high calorie dinner at the spur of the moment because it looks good. You’ve already made a choice.
6. Have an email accountability partner. If you start emailing a person of the opposite sex, have them CC (carbon copy) every email they send to you, to someone else you trust—a parent, mentor, relative or pastor. You will be less likely to say things or hear things that will cause you to become emotionally attached.
7. Be careful about texting someone of the opposite sex. We tend to write things in texts that we wouldn’t normally say in a group of people, being that the conversation seems really private. It’s almost like an inside joke, where only you and the other person know what’s so funny. Be careful when texting the opposite sex.
8. Don’t be afraid to be up front about your stand for purity. Any person not willing to stick around after they know where you stand isn’t someone you want to spend your time with.
9. Spend a lot of time with Jesus. He is your best friend and ally. Spend a lot of time reading the Bible. Someone once told me “It never hurts to read the Bible”. I heartily agree. It NEVER HURTS to read the Bible. It is always a good use of your time. God is able to speak to you through the words written on those pages and it will always be time well spent. It will always produce a good harvest.
10. Remember that we are all farmers. We are all sowing seeds everyday. Try to remember that what you do today, will be your tomorrow. Our actions today have a tremendous impact on what happens in our future.
11. Wear a purity ring, necklace, dog tag, bracelet…something that reminds you of your commitment to purity. We need to be reminded on a daily, hourly, sometimes minute basis that we are fighting for a worthy cause.
12. Listen to great Christian music. Listen to the Bible on CD.
13. Write letters to your future spouse. Write letters to Jesus.
14. Keep busy with activities that are helpful to your family, community, church, etc. Mainly because you don’t have a lot of free time to do whatever you want. I’m not just talking about social activities, in fact I’m not really talking about them at all. I mean like, doing extra chores, babysitting, cleaning at the church, or helping out with the ladies or men’s meetings, volunteering in the nursery. Offering to babysit your siblings ON A FRIDAY NIGHT…..so your parents can go out and have a nice evening.
15. Realize that you are fighting in a battle. I know it’s hard. It is really. But it’s so worth it. Finally, I’d like to leave you with an encouraging verse that highlights the fact that we are in a battle. Galatians 6:9 says “And let us not lose heart and grow weary and faint in acting nobly and doing right, for in due time and at the appointed season we shall reap, if we do not loosen and relax our courage and faint.”
~Contributed by Annie, GOV Warehouse Manager (Visit our Team page for Annie’s bio)
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